Not Finished Yet - I Am a Work In Progress - Be Patient With Me

This post came as a response to a comment for the article: Disappointed in Church Leaders. Elsa made a comment what really challenged me to look deeper and this is the answer to her comment. Because it’s too long and deep I made it into an entire post. I love when we get open about our thought. 

Elsa,

If you read carefully the entire article, then you would see that I did take my disappointment to God. I am one of that people who is far too sincere and honest and yes talked directly to the person too. 

The challenge for me is you suggesting that talking publicly about our "disappointments” brings destruction to the Body of Christ and can badly hurt people's faith. I would say that the disappointments itself DOES bring destruction to the Body of Christ and DO HURT BADLY people’s faith. Many people GIVE UP their faith in God all together BECAUSE they ARE disappointed in church leaders, not because we talk about  these disappointments publicly. 

OUR LIFE IS PUBLIC!!! Jesus didn’t have a double life. Jesus didn’t have a public face and a private face. When he was disappointed in his disciples he spoke up PUBLICLY. (Matthew 17: 17- that verse is for his disciples)  When he was disappointed in the Pharisees and Religious leaders he spoke up publicly against them (Matthew 23:1-35). When Jesus was disappointed about what church looked like he publicly knocked the tables over and spoke up openly his disappointment (Mark 12:15-17). 

Our life IS a public life. We shouldn’t have double lives. This website is my personal faith journey and IS honest, public and transparent!!! I choose to live a public transparent life. I do make mistakes. If you read my blog you can see that I did share and will share many more of my past and future times and circumstances when I screwed and will screw up. 

This website is my life in public, my struggle and doubt and my growth and joy. My real life. It’s a public life. I talk about my disappointments and how God helps me to work them out with his help. The problem is NOT that we talk publicly and honestly about our problems and disappointments; the problem IS the PROBLEM – when we hide that there is a problem and when pretends that there is no problem at all. Disappointments arise when we pretend that all is good, when we don’t face reality face on and challenge ourselves and others to their best. 

Spiritual leaders are called for higher standards; they ought to LEAD by example not by words, and just because most of them think that their private - behind the door life can be far from what their public life is, that doesn’t mean that others don’t see the real thing.  If they don’t stop and change to be worthy of their call they ARE the problem: They personally are the ones who DO bring destruction to the body because their life does NOT reflect what they talk!!! When leaders DON’T live up to what they preach THAT DOES badly hurt people’s faith. 

As a mom I can NOT expect anything from my kids if I do NOT live it up to them. Your words are worthless in front of your kids if you don’t live the life you thought them. We as parents LEAD BY EXAMPLE. A spiritual leader can NEVER lead if he/she doesn’t LEAD BY EXAMPLE. The interesting thing is that the Bible clearly puts it that what is spoken behind close doors will be all in public. You can’t have a double life forever. You can’t pretend forever. And my personal faith journey, my personal Christian life IS a public life, and yes when I am disappointed and when I screw it up its all public. And this website is a venue of my personal faith journey, my life as a work in progress in God’s hand. If we who call ourselves Christians will take the risk to be transparent about our life struggles and ups and downs and those who watch us will see that, yes, being a Christian doesn’t mean to be disappointment and pain free … maybe, just maybe some will see that we are real humans too. 

I know without doubt that I did and I will disappoint others. So, when someone tells me that I screwed things up, I do make it public, I do apologize publicly so people can see my real emotions and how I take them to God and how HE helps me to move on and become a better person. I am not finished yet! I do not pretend I am! I know I have faults, so I publicly talk about them. If you just read this one article then take the time to read some more and you’ll see I am an open book. You know what?  When you don’t hide your faults, mistakes and sins you don’t have to be afraid that someone will make them public. 

The question is for all my readuers what do you think: talking publicly about our "disappointments” IS WHAT brings destruction to the Body of Christ and can badly hurt people's faith??? OR  the disappointments itself IS WHAT brings destruction to the Body of Christ and DOES HURT BADLY people’s faith?  So it’s talking about it or the problems itself are to blame? Should we stop talking about our disappointments in church leaders and pastors OR should those church leaders listen when we share our disappointments and CHANGE so they would stop hurting the Body of Christ and people’s faith?